Good Listening - Good Networking

Good networking takes good listening.  Unfortunately, most people believe that good networking is telling everyone about himself or herself.  What good is word of mouth if nobody is listening?

 Think about the last networking event that you attended, was everyone quietly listening, maintaining eye contact, asking valuable questions, and responding to you with more than just uh huh. 

Listening is the most important part of good networking, it allows you to learn what others are trying to accomplish, hear others express needs they may have, and be able to connect those who can help them.

 Following are 7 tips for better listening at your next networking event;

 1.  Maintain active eye contact.  Do not look over the persons shoulder as if there might be someone better coming into the room.  This sends the clear message to the person you are speaking to and that message is; you are not important, and I really don’t care what you have to say

 2.  Ask great questions.  People love to talk about themselves, so ask them, questions about what they do, why they chose to do it, how did they get into their business, and what do they love to do when they are not working in their business.  Stephen Covey says that you must seek to understand before being understood, asking questions allows you to understand a person better.

 3.  Find some common ground. When you ask about skills or interest, you will often find things that you have in common.  Common ground leads to good rapport with others.

 4.  Take notes whenever possible, you can jot a few notes about what you have learned on the back of the business card.  I always ask permission before writing on the back of another person’s business card.  Not because I really believe it will be a problem, but because when I ask, they always say Thanks for Asking and they remember that I honored their business card.

 5.  Stay engaged in the conversation.  People are often busy thinking about what they are going to say when it is their turn to speak.  By asking questions, commenting back, and making comments you stay involved in what is being said versus what you are going to say.

 6.  If the room is too noisy for you to hear, ask your partner to step out of the crowd.  Most open networking events are very loud and they seem to get louder as the evening goes on.  Ask the person you are speaking to if they will step to the sideline so that you can better hear them.  Again, this is another reason to maintain eye contact.

 7. At the end of the conversation give some feed back, emphasize something you may have heard or learned from that person. 

 God gave us two ears and one mouth, let’s use them proportionately.  Listen twice as much as you speak.  By doing so you will be able to connect more people, give better referrals, and become a better gatekeeper.