In Networking, Character is Much Easier Kept Than Recovered

There is a quote by Abigail van Buren that I love, it goes something like this:  “The best index to a person’s character is how they treat people who can’t do them any good, and how they treat people who can’t fight back.”

I believe that good character is more to be praised than outstanding talent.  Recently I attended the Vista California Chamber of Commerce Business Expo with five of my students to learn how to work a networking event, along with 1,500 other professionals visiting the 150 professionals who were displaying their companies in the expo exhibit area.

As we approached one of the booths, a well known Real Estate Investing Educational company we noticed a woman in a deep discussion with the individual tending the booth.  The woman was having a hard time understanding why a professional would want to attend a University to learn how to become truly financially independent through proper education.

The gentleman tending the booth answered by saying that she could learn what the wealthy have known for years.  He stated that only his company offers the total solution to lead her to wealth in real estate.  He continued by saying that she could learn about multiple streams of income and become part of a community of like-mined investors that support each other.

This woman continued to ask questions, the more questions she asked the more frustrated the man in the booth became, and with each answer his voice rose.  Within minutes he was almost yelling and was treating this woman with contempt.  The woman eyes tiered up and she finally moved away toward the next booth.

As she struck up a conversation with the attendant in the next booth, she related what a horrible experience she had in the last booth.  As I followed this woman from booth to booth she continued to relate what a horrible time she had while stopping to talk with the man in the Real Estate Investing booth.  Since there was only one such booth, everyone knew who she was talking about, especially my students who really learned a phenomenal lesson about how fast bad news can travel throughout an event when you don’t treat people by the golden rule of networking.  Treat others how they want to be treated, not how you want to be treated.

The gentleman had become what we call a scorched earth networker, killing a relationship before there was a relationship and creating an atmosphere where he was going to loose more than he gained at this event.

Here is a simple tip for referral opportunities:  “It is far better to have character that to be one.”

Comments

[Mark Johnson]

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[Brock Butler]

I think that original quote was Smual Johnson. “The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no harm.” This is in Guy Kawasaki's last chapter "The Art of the Start".

I agree with your blog 300%.